


just pretend

by sleeepybear



Category: Persona 4
Genre: F/M, Fake Marriage, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Love Confessions, the ocs are just for dumb plot lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-15 20:22:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18676768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleeepybear/pseuds/sleeepybear
Summary: Kanji's been in love with the same girl for 7 years.Everyone has their breaking points.(AKA the fake marriage fic no one asked for)





	just pretend

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in an absolute rush at 9:30 at night because i just got this urge to get it out today so here it is lol
> 
> not beta'd, all mistakes are my own!

They're friends. Best friends.  _ Just _ best friends. It hurts, of course it does. But what Naoto wants, Naoto gets, and he'll never have the guts to man up and tell her that he's been in love with her for years now.

 

She got a job. A big fancy one, better than the freelance detective stuff she had done all through high school. He put on a big smile and congratulated her along with everyone else. But a new job like that meant business trips. Time spent away from Inaba, from her friends, from  _ him. _ It would have been selfish to ask her to stay, so he didn't.

 

“How long are you going to pine after Naoto?” Rise asked one day. They had gone out to lunch in Okina. Unlike Naoto, she came back to Inaba all the time to visit, so an excursion to the nearby city was no big deal.

 

“Huh?” He had answered, as if he didn't know exactly what she meant.

 

Rise swirls her drink around with her straw, all absentmindedly. “You've been after her since highschool. How many years has it been? Six?”

 

“Seven years and 4 months.” He corrects her without even thinking.   


  
“See, this is what I mean!” She takes the straw out of her drink, pointing it at him all accusingly, getting soda all over the table.   


  
“I don’t follow.” He follows, alright.   


  
“You’re losing your mind over this girl, Kanji. It's not healthy.”   


  
“So?” He grumbles.   


  
“ _ So,  _ either do something and stop being such a lovesick puppy dog, or move on!”    


  
He shakes his head. “There ain’t anybody on this earth like her, Rise, you know that.”   


  
“But you know plenty of other girls?” She tilts her head at him.

  
God, she’s right. Why couldn’t it have been any other girl he knows?   


  
They drop the Naoto topic quickly after that, and Rise talks about some new idol outfit she wants made. He makes notes without truly being present.   


  
In the days after that conversation, he considers over and over what it would be like to date any of the other girls, trying to get himself out of this one sided love affair he’s been in for 7  _ fucking  _ years.   


  
He closes  his eyes, and imagines.   


  
Chie’s spunky, a bit loud maybe, but they always got along pretty well. He tries to imagine it, what that relationship would be like, but every time he tries to imagine what a date would be like with her, her face morphs into a familiar detective’s, and her hair turns that shade of dark blue he loves, and god  _ damn _ it.   


  
Yukiko. She’s great. Visits the shop all the time, where he’s still at, even after highschool. His ma loves the girl, because her inn buys tons of their stuff. She’s gentle, maybe a bit of an airhead. Has that kind of elegance that a guy could really go for.   


  
_ You know who else is elegant? Kind?  _ His minds whispers, and he rubs his eyes so hard when he opens them again he sees spots in his vision.    


  
Who else. Who else? An image of Teddie flashes through his mind, that time they did that crossdressing thing in high school, and he  _ aggressively  _ shakes his head. Hell no. Not even going to  _ go _ there.    


  
God damn it. God fucking damn it.   


  
One day, he’s in the shop. Frustrated as all hell. Some couple came in, obviously not from around town. Wanted some wedding kimonos. Fine, whatever, he can do that. But they couldn’t decide on a single thing, so an appointment that should’ve taken an hour or two at most ended up taking  _ five.  _ So yeah. Ready to rip his hair out. Closed down the shop early, since there was no way he was going to deal with anyone else after that fiasco of an appointment.   


  
He’s sketching something, and hell no, that looks way too much like a certain cap she used to wear. Erases it, and starts to try again, just as the door opens.    
  
“Oh, hey, we’re-” He looks up.   


  
No way. No fucking way.   


  
“I’m sorry. I saw the closed sign, I just thought that maybe…” She trails off, and  _ closes _ off, visibly, body language changing ever so slightly.   
  
“Nah, nah, c’mon in. Anything for an old friend, y’know?” He quickly stands up, totally not hitting his knee on the table, what are you talking about?    
  
“Oh.” And she opens back up again, just like that.   


  
It’s been forever since he’s seen her, face to face. They’ve texted, obviously, but she’s so busy it's damn near impossible to get a hold of her anymore. She looks different. Good, but different. The hair she kept short in her youth has grown pretty damn long over the years, nearly going down to her waist. And she’s in business casual attire, of course, could fit better, but that's just the tailor in him being nitpicky.    


  
“C-come in, Naoto, don’t stand in the door like a stranger.” He beckons her closer, and she obeys, softly and carefully closing the door behind her.    


  
“You want some tea? You could go get settled in the living room, and I’ll make it.” He offers. Who knows when she flew into Inaba from who knows where, she’s probably dead on her feet.   


  
“Thank you. I’ll do just that.” His assumption seemed to be correct, as she looks incredibly grateful, obediently going to sit in the living room. And so he goes to make the tea.   
  
\---   
  
“You want me to do what?”   


  
He nearly drops his teacup, staring at her like she’s lost her mind. And  _ god, _ she makes it worse, the tiniest hint of pink in her cheeks that appears has no business making his heart skip a beat like that.    


  
“I just figured you were the right person to ask. If I was wrong in that assumption, I can always ask one of my colleagues--”   


  
_“No!”_   


  
She blinks, looking shocked at his outburst. Shit, Tatsumi, think fast.   


  
“N-no, uh, what I meant was, you don’t have to do that. I’ll do it.”

  
He can’t believe it. He’s going to go undercover with her. As her fake  _ husband.  _ Either this is the best thing the universe has ever gifted him, or the absolute worst.    
  
“So, uh, when do we start?”   
  
\---   
  
So, uh. Yeah, this is both the worst and best thing to ever have happened to him. They got wedding rings, and the fact that it fits him perfectly is both concerning (how did they know his size?) and a slight relief. Except that, again, these are wedding rings. And he hasn’t even confessed to this girl yet.   
  
It's all fake. She’s such a good actor. It doesn’t feel fake.   
  
“So, how did you two meet?”   
  
The smiling couple sitting across from them. The woman asks them this. Apparently these two are the ones they’re supposed to investigate and befriend. He wasn’t told much, but Naoto knows. He trusts her.   


  
“Oh, in high school.” Naoto smiles up at him, leaning against his shoulder. He keeps changing his mind. This is  _ heaven, _ this is  _ hell, _ it's everything he ever wanted and it's everything he knows he can’t have.    


  
“High school sweethearts, then? How romantic.” The woman sighs, and Kanji has to force a smile.    


  
“Yeah. Knew she was the one from the moment I saw her.” That’s not too far from the truth. She’s the entire reason he got that stupid dungeon all those years ago, after all.   
  
“How sweet!” The woman coos. The man still looks so uninterested. “And how did you start dating?”   
  
“Kanji confessed to me at the riverbank, at sunset, and got me there by leaving a note in my shoe locker. I had no idea who it was, until I showed up, and there he was. One of my best friends.” She laces their fingers together, and he can feel the cold metal of the band around her ring finger against his hand.    


  
This is all an act. It can’t all just be an act. God, he can’t do this.   


  
“Uh, can you let me go for a minute? Gotta go use the restroom.”    


  
“Oh, of course.” She lets go of his hand, the slightest bit of concern visible underneath the facade she put on for this assignment.   


  
Without another word, he makes his escape.   
  


He splashes some cold water on his face, looking himself in the mirror. It's him, same as always. Nothing’s changed. Everything has changed. It hurts, it hurts too much. He has to tell her he can’t do this. He has to say something. Tonight.   


  
He’ll say something tonight.   
  
\---   
  
“Well. I’d say that went well.” Naoto’s reverted back to Naoto, no longer the loving, doting wife she had to act like all night. They;’re safely in their fake apartment, under fake names, a fake marriage binding them.   


  
“I can’t do this anymore.” He mumbles, looking down at his feet.   


  
“Pardon?”    


  
“Naoto, I--” His tongue darts out to wet his lips, mouth suddenly completely dry. He raises his voice.   


  
“I can’t do this anymore.”   


  
She frowns.    


  
“Why not?”   
  
And there's the question. The dreaded ‘why not.’    


  
“This... this is torture. I can’t do this anymore.” He echoes, and she opens her mouth, but he holds up a hand. “Please. Just, lemme talk.”   


  
She shuts her mouth.   


  
“I don’t know how else to say this. Naoto, I..” He runs a hand through his hair. “I’ve been in love with you. For years, now. Seven  _ fucking _ years, Naoto. And having you look at me like that, like I’m anything more than just a friend, it’s gonna kill me. I can’t.”    


  
Her expressions are always so hard to read, but this time, he really can’t tell what she’s thinking. So he keeps going.

  
  
“I swear to God, the first time I saw ya, I was.. I was fucking hooked. Y’know? And, you were even the cause of that fucking dungeon.” The most embarrassing, except for maybe Rise’s. It just had to be a bathhouse. “And even after it turned out you were a girl, I was still crazy about you. I tried so hard to just let the feelings die, cuz everyone knows someone like you would never fall for a big lizard brain like me. So yeah. I can't do this assignment with ya anymore. I ain't gonna torture myself with something I won't ever have.”

 

The silence that follows is deafening. Almost worse than a flat out rejection.

 

“Kanji.” She starts, cautiously, like he's an animal she might spook if she moves too fast.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I think it would be best, if we we are both given time to… reflect, on what you said just now.”

 

He can feel himself deflate. That's a no. That's so totally a no.

 

“I'll sleep on the couch tonight.” She offers, and he doesn't even have the strength to object.

 

\---

 

He couldn't sleep. He fucked it all up. Just should've kept his mouth shut for another seven years. Maybe until he died.

 

He took off the ring on his finger, and left it on the nightstand. He doesn't even look at it when he wakes up, trudging out to the kitchen without thinking.

 

“Kanji.”

 

Shit, he _ forgot _ .

 

“Come sit.”

 

He can't even think of denying her.

 

So he sits on the couch, next to her. Doesn't dare look at her.

 

“I was considering what you said. Last night.”

 

He nods, numbly. Alright. Get to the rejection already.

 

“And I.. is, is all of that how you really feel?”

 

He looks at her. For the first time in a long time, she looks nervous. Really, truly, vulnerable. And it scares him.

 

“Yeah.” He confirms.

 

“I… I wouldn't be opposed to exploring the option of a romantic relationship with you.”

 

No way.

 

He didn't hear that right.

 

“You… you for real?”

 

Her cheeks turn the slightest bit red. “I would not joke about a matter this serious.”

 

Instead of responding, he pulls her in for a hug. For a moment, this seems like the wrong move, but then she melts against him, hugging back.

 

“I won't be home very often.”

 

“I know.” 

 

“I may have bad days where I act prickly. Work is stressful.”

 

“That's fine.”

 

“I'm not the easiest person to love.”  She warns, and he only squeezes her tighter.

 

“That's alright. I've been doing it for this long. Might as well keep going.”

  
The giggle that escapes her makes his heart feel like a balloon, filling up with air.   


  
“Well. Let's see where fate takes us, shall we?”    


  
He can’t stop himself from smiling.   


  
“Yeah. Lets.” 

**Author's Note:**

> welcome to the end! this is my favorite persona ship of all time, so its about time i wrote for them,,,,
> 
> hope you enjoyed! pls tell me what u think!


End file.
